书城公版The Complete Plays
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第13章

GIU.Our case exactly! We are over head and ears in love with somebody else! (Enter Gianetta and Tessa.) In point of fact, with our wives!

CAS.Your wives! Then you are married?

TESS.It's not our fault.

GIA.We knew nothing about it.

BOTH.We are sisters in misfortune.

CAS.My good girls, I don't blame you.Only before we go any further we must really arrive at some satisfactory arrangement, or we shall get hopelessly complicated.

QUINTET AND FINALE.

MARCO, GIUSEPPE, CASILDA, GIANETTA, TESSA.

ALL.Here is a case unprecedented!

Here are a King and Queen ill-starred!

Ever since marriage was first invented Never was known a case so hard!

MAR.and I may be said to have been bisected, GIU.By a profound catastrophe!

CAS., GIA.,Through a calamity unexpected TESS.I am divisible into three!

ALL.O moralists all, How can you call Marriage a state of unitee, When excellent husbands are bisected, And wives divisible into three?

O moralists all, How can you call Marriage a state of union true?

CAS., GIA., One-third of myself is married to half of ye TESS.or you,MAR.and When half of myself has married one-third of ye GIU.or you?

(Enter Don Alhambra, followed by Duke, Duchess, and all the Chorus.)FINALE.

RECITATIVE--DON ALHAMBRA.

Now let the loyal lieges gather round--

The Prince's foster-mother has been found!

She will declare, to silver clarion's sound, The rightful King--let him forthwith be crowned!

CHORUS.She will declare, etc.

(Don Alhambra brings forward Inez, the Prince's foster-mother.)TESS.Speak, woman, speak--DUKE.We're all attention!

GIA.The news we seek-

DUCH.This moment mention.

CAS.To us they bring--

DON AL.His foster-mother.

MAR.Is he the King?

GIU.Or this my brother?

ALL.Speak, woman, speak, etc.

RECITATIVE--INEZ.

The Royal Prince was by the King entrusted To my fond care, ere I grew old and crusted;When traitors came to steal his son reputed, My own small boy I deftly substituted!

The villains fell into the trap completely--I hid the Prince away--still sleeping sweetly:

I called him "son" with pardonable slyness--His name, Luiz! Behold his Royal Highness!

(Sensation.Luiz ascends the throne, crowned and robed as King.)CAS.(rushing to his arms).Luiz!

LUIZ.Casilda! (Embrace.)

ALL.Is this indeed the King?

Oh, wondrous revelation!

Oh, unexpected thing!

Unlooked-for situation!

MAR., GIA.,This statement we receive GIU., TESS.With sentiments conflicting;Our hearts rejoice and grieve, Each other contradicting;To those whom we adore We can be reunited--On one point rather sore, But, on the whole, delighted!

LUIZ.When others claimed thy dainty hand, I waited--waited--waited,DUKE.As prudence (so I understand)Dictated--tated--tated.

CAS.By virtue of our early vow Recorded--corded--corded,DUCH.Your pure and patient love is now Rewarded--warded--warded.

ALL.Then hail, O King of a Golden Land, And the high-born bride who claims his hand!

The past is dead, and you gain your own, A royal crown and a golden throne!

(All kneel: Luiz crowns Casilda.)

ALL.Once more gondolieri, Both skilful and wary, Free from this quandary Contented are we.Ah!

From Royalty flying, Our gondolas plying, And merrily crying Our "preme," "stali!" Ah!

So good-bye, cachucha, fandango, bolero--We'll dance a farewell to that measure--

Old Xeres, adieu--Manzanilla--Montero--

We leave you with feelings of pleasure!

CURTAIN

THE GRAND DUKE

OR

THE STATUTORY DUEL

by W.S.Gilbert DRAMATIS PERSONAE.

RUDOLPH (Grand Duke of Pfennig Halbpfennig).

ERNEST DUMMKOPF (a Theatrical Manager).

LUDWIG (his Leading Comedian).

DR.TANNHUSER (a Notary).

THE PRINCE OF MONTE CARLO.

VISCOUNT MENTONE.

BEN HASHBAZ (a Costumier).

HERALD.

----

THE PRINCESS OF MONTE CARLO (betrothed to RUDOLPH).

THE BARONESS VON KRAKENFELDT (betrothed to RUDOLPH).

JULIA JELLICOE (an English Comdienne).

LISA (a Soubrette).

Members of Ernest Dummkopf's Company:

OLGA

GRETCHEN

BERTHA

ELSA

MARTHA

Chamberlains, Nobles, Actors, Actresses, etc.

----

ACT I.--Scene.Public Square of Speisesaal.

ACT II.--Scene.Hall in the Grand Ducal Palace.

Date 1750.

First produced at the Savoy Theatre on March 7, 1896.

ACT I.

SCENE.--Market-place of Speisesaal, in the Grand Duchy of Pfennig Halbpfennig.A well, with decorated ironwork, up L.C.GRETCHEN, BERTHA, OLGA, MARTHA, and other members of ERNEST DUMMKOPF'Stheatrical company are discovered, seated at several small tables, enjoying a repast in honour of the nuptials of LUDWIG, his leading comedian, and LISA, his soubrette.

CHORUS.

Won't it be a pretty wedding?

Will not Lisa look delightful?

Smiles and tears in plenty shedding--

Which in brides of course is rightful One could say, if one were spiteful, Contradiction little dreading, Her bouquet is simply frightful--Still, 'twill be a pretty wedding!

Oh, it is a pretty wedding!

Such a pretty, pretty wedding!

ELSA.If her dress is badly fitting, Theirs the fault who made her trousseau.

BERTHA.If her gloves are always splitting, Cheap kid gloves, we know, will do so.

OLGA.If upon her train she stumbled, On one's train one's always treading.

GRET.If her hair is rather tumbled, Still, 'twill be a pretty wedding!

CHORUS.Such a pretty, pretty wedding!

CHORUS.

Here they come, the couple plighted--

On life's journey gaily start them.

Soon to be for aye united, Till divorce or death shall part them.

(LUDWIG and LISA come forward.)

DUET--LUDWIG and LISA.

LUD.Pretty Lisa, fair and tasty, Tell me now, and tell me truly, Haven't you been rather hasty?

Haven't you been rash unduly?

Am I quite the dashing sposo That your fancy could depict you?

Perhaps you think I'm only so-so?

(She expresses admiration.)

Well, I will not contradict you!

CHORUS.No, he will not contradict you!

LISA.Who am I to raise objection?

I'm a child, untaught and homely--