When I was 17, a boy broke my heart. The night he called for the last time, I cried myself to sleep. When I awoke in the morning, there was a message scribbled on my mirror in red lipstick: “Heartily know, when half-gods go, the gods arrive.”I thought about that quotation from Emerson for a long time, and until my heart healed, I left it where my mother had written it. When I finally went to get the glass cleaner, my mother knew everything was all right again.
I don‘t remember ever slamming my door in anger at her and shouting,“You just don’t understand!”because she did understand.
One month before my high-school graduation, my father died of a heart attack. My feelings ranged from grief to abandonment, fear and overwhelming anger that my dad was missing some of the most important events in my life. I became completely uninterested in my upcoming graduation, the senior-class play and the prom. But my mother, in the midst of her own grief, would not hear of my skipping any of those things.
The day before my father died, my mother and I had gone shopping for a prom dress. We‘d found a spectacular one, with yards and yards of dotted Swiss in red, white and blue, it made me feel like Scarlett O’Hara, but it was the wrong size. When my father died, I forgot about the dress.
My mother didn‘t. The day before the prom, I found that dress- in the right size- draped majestically over the living-room sofa. It wasn’t just delivered, still in the box. It was presented to me- beautifully, artistically, lovingly. I didn‘t care if I had a new dress or not. But mymother did.
She wanted her children to feel loved and lovable, creative and imaginative, imbued with a sense that there was magic in the world and beauty even in the face of adversity. In truth, my mother wanted her children to see themselves much like the gardenia- lovely, strong and perfect- with an aura of magic and perhaps a bit of mystery.
My mother died ten days after I married. I was 22 years old. That was the year the gardenias stopped coming.
栀子花开的时候,全世界的爱都在我身边。
参考翻译(佚名)
从我12岁那年起,每年都有人在我生日那天把一枝洁白的栀子花送到家里(马里兰州贝塞斯达镇上),没有卡片,也没有字条。我多次打电话到花店询问,但总问不出个所以然来--这些都是用现金支付的。后来,我就不再追查送花人,只是尽情享受那枝神秘的、用粉红绢纸包扎的雪白花朵的瑰丽和浓郁芳香。
我还是不停地猜测这位匿名送花者是谁。有时,我最喜欢做的事就是揣测这个人,或许他是一个无比优秀的人,但过于腼腆或者性格古怪而不愿透露身份。
母亲也和我一起猜测,很多猜想还出于她的点拨。她会问我,你是不是给谁做了件好事,所以人家用这种方式来答谢。或许是邻居吧,我曾帮她卸下满满一车杂货。也有可能是马路对面的那个老先生,寒冬时,我帮他取过邮件,这样他就不必走下结冰的台阶去取了。然而,正值花季的我,宁愿相信这个人是我暗恋的男孩,或是注意我而我浑然不知的某个男生。
17岁那年,一个男生深深地伤了我的心。他最后一次打电话给我的那晚,我失声痛哭,后来,就不知不觉地睡着了。第二天早上醒来时,我看见镜子上有一行潦草的字,是用红色唇膏写的--“切记:半仙离去,真神到来”。我一直没擦去这些字。关于爱默生的这句话,我想了很久,最后,终于想通了。于是,在我去拿玻璃清洁剂时,母亲知道一切又恢复正常了。
记忆中,我从未冲母亲发过脾气,然后摔门而去,还吼道:“你根本不理解!”因为母亲太了解我了。
在我高中毕业的前一个月,父亲因心脏病离开了人世。我的情绪波动很大,时而悲痛哀伤、自暴自弃,时而恐惧胆怯、怨气冲天。我知道,父亲再也不能亲眼目睹我人生中的大事了。我沉浸在这种痛苦当中不能自拔,对临近的毕业典礼、演出和舞会全然没有兴趣。而母亲,虽然也陷入巨大的悲痛之中,但她执意让我参与那些活动。父亲去世的前一天,我和母亲上街去买我在舞会时要穿的衣服。我们选中了一件极漂亮的衣服,上面印有红、白、蓝三色瑞士风格的小圆点。穿上它,我感觉自己像斯佳丽,只是大小不合适。父亲病故后,我就把那件衣服忘了。但母亲没忘。毕业舞会的前一天,我发现那件衣服--大小适宜--挂在客厅的沙发上,看起来是那么华丽端庄。它并不是像店里送来的那样,还装在盒内,而是亮丽典雅地呈现在我眼前。有没有新衣服,我无所谓,但母亲在乎。
母亲希望我能感受到他人的爱,能招人喜欢、有创造力、想象力丰富,也希望我相信世间总有奇迹,相信即便是身处逆境,也会有美好。事实上,母亲希望我视自己为洁白的栀子花--可爱、健壮、完美--并带着神奇的芳香和些许的神秘。
我婚后十天,母亲就撒手人寰。当时我22岁,也就是在那一年,再没人送来洁白的栀子花了。
MyFatherWasMyHero我的父亲是我的英雄
Anonymous
My father was my hero, all throughout my life.
The father of eight children, he saw his share of strife. When I was very little, he appeared to be so large.
In my eyes he could do anything, we all knew he was in charge. He was a man of great strength both physically and in mind,but in him there was a gentleness, he found ways to be outgoing and kind.
Many days of childhood were greeted with a kiss and songs to me as I awoke, those days I surely miss.
He made me feel so special,“Miss America”he would sing.
I knew I had my father’s love. It gave me courage to do almost anything.
From him I learned to stand up tall, to be proud of who I am. Strength and determination were the qualities of this fine man.
As the years of his life dwindled down, that strength kept him alive.
Plus the unfailing determination to help my ailing mother have the care she needed to survive.
He loved her and his children, so much he gave up years of his life caring for this woman, his soul mate, his wife.
Day and night he struggled for years with her disease.
A lesser man would have been brought down to his knees.
With illnesses of his own, he still stood by her side caring for her and loving her until the day she died.
Twenty days later his own time was at an end.
I lost my hero, my father, a man who was my friend. A few years have passed, and life just isn‘t the same.
But as Father’s Day approaches, I will celebrate his name. With prayers to him and God above to stay by my side.
To watch over me and guide me, to look down on me with pride. For I am my father‘s daughter, one day we will meet again.
But until then I will remember, and the love will never end.
每个父亲都是孩子眼中的英雄。
参考翻译(佚名)在我的一生中,父亲都是我的英雄。作为八个孩子的父亲,他明白自己的责任。当我还小的时候,他显得那么强大。在我眼里,他能够做任何事情,我们都知道他当家。他在身体和精神上都非常强大,但是,他的内心非常温柔,让人常常感觉到他的友善和宽容。我真切地想念那些童年的日子,每天被他的吻和歌声唤醒。他让我感觉如此特别,“美国小姐”,他轻轻吟唱。我知道我享有父亲的爱,这爱几乎给了我做任何事情的勇气。从他那里,我学会昂首挺胸,学会为自己骄傲。力量和决心是这个男人优秀的品质。虽然容颜渐老,但力量使他充满活力。由于他坚定的决心,我多病的母亲才能得到活下去所需要的照顾。他爱她和孩子们,他用多年的生命去照顾这位女人、他灵魂的伴侣、他的妻子。
日日夜夜,他同她的疾病斗争了多年。如果是一个不太坚强的男人,恐怕早已屈服。自己重病缠身,他依然在她身边照顾她、爱她直到她离开。20天后,他自己的生命走向终结。我失去了我的英雄,我的父亲,我的朋友。很多年过去了,生活也变化很多。但随着父亲节的来临,我要赞美他。祈祷他和上帝同在我身边。看护我,引导我,骄傲地俯视我。因为我是父亲的女儿,终有一天,我们会重逢。但在那之前,我将永远怀念他、爱他。
All You Remember 你所记得的一切
Debbie Farmer
All you remember about your child being an infant is the incredible awe you felt about the precious miracle you created. You remember having plenty of time to bestow all your wisdom and knowledge. You thought your child would take all of your advice and make fewer mistakes, and be much smarter than you were. You wished for your child to hurry and grow up.