I have,indeed,been told by Mrs.Desmoulins,who,before her marriage,lived for some time with Mrs.Johnson at Hampstead,that she indulged herself in country air and nice living,at an unsuitable expense,while her husband was drudging in the smoke of London,and that she by no means treated him with that complacency which is the most engaging quality in a wife.But all this is perfectly compatible with his fondness for her,especially when it is remembered that he had a high opinion of her understanding,and that the impressions which her beauty,real or imaginary,had originally made upon his fancy,being continued by habit,had not been effaced,though she herself was doubtless much altered for the worse.The dreadful shock of separation took place in the night;and he immediately dispatched a letter to his friend,the Reverend Dr.Taylor,which,as Taylor told me,expressed grief in the strongest manner he had ever read;so that it is much to be regretted it has not been preserved.The letter was brought to Dr.
Taylor,at his house in the Cloisters,Westminster,about three in the morning;and as it signified an earnest desire to see him,he got up,and went to Johnson as soon as he was dressed,and found him in tears and in extreme agitation.After being a little while together,Johnson requested him to join with him in prayer.He then prayed extempore,as did Dr.Taylor;and thus,by means of that piety which was ever his primary object,his troubled mind was,in some degree,soothed and composed.
The next day he wrote as follows:
'To THE REVEREND DR.TAYLOR.
'DEAR SIR,--Let me have your company and instruction.Do not live away from me.My distress is great.
'Pray desire Mrs.Taylor to inform me what mourning I should buy for my mother and Miss Porter,and bring a note in writing with you.
'Remember me in your prayers,for vain is the help of man.I am,dear Sir,&c.
'March 18,1752.'
'SAM.JOHNSON.'
That his sufferings upon the death of his wife were severe,beyond what are commonly endured,I have no doubt,from the information of many who were then about him,to none of whom I give more credit than to Mr.Francis Barber,his faithful negro servant,who came into his family about a fortnight after the dismal event.These sufferings were aggravated by the melancholy inherent in his constitution;and although he probably was not oftener in the wrong than she was,in the little disagreements which sometimes troubled his married state,during which,he owned to me,that the gloomy irritability of his existence was more painful to him than ever,he might very naturally,after her death,be tenderly disposed to charge himself with slight omissions and offences,the sense of which would give him much uneasiness.Accordingly we find,about a year after her decease,that he thus addressed the Supreme Being:
'O LORD,who givest the grace of repentance,and hearest the prayers of the penitent,grant that by true contrition I may obtain forgiveness of all the sins committed,and of all duties neglected in my union with the wife whom thou hast taken from me;for the neglect of joint devotion,patient exhortation,and mild instruction.'The kindness of his heart,notwithstanding the impetuosity of his temper,is well known to his friends;and Icannot trace the smallest foundation for the following dark and uncharitable assertion by Sir John Hawkins:'The apparition of his departed wife was altogether of the terrifick kind,and hardly afforded him a hope that she was in a state of happiness.'That he,in conformity with the opinion of many of the most able,learned,and pious Christians in all ages,supposed that there was a middle state after death,previous to the time at which departed souls are finally received to eternal felicity,appears,I think,unquestionably from his devotions:'And,O LORD,so far as it may be lawful in me,I commend to thy fatherly goodness the soul of my departed wife;beseeching thee to grant her whatever is best in her present state,and finally to receive her to eternal happiness.'
But this state has not been looked upon with horrour,but only as less gracious.
He deposited the remains of Mrs.Johnson in the church of Bromley,in Kent,to which he was probably led by the residence of his friend Hawkesworth at that place.The funeral sermon which he composed for her,which was never preached,but having been given to Dr.Taylor,has been published since his death,is a performance of uncommon excellence,and full of rational and pious comfort to such as are depressed by that severe affliction which Johnson felt when he wrote it.When it is considered that it was written in such an agitation of mind,and in the short interval between her death and burial,it cannot be read without wonder.
From Mr.Francis Barber I have had the following authentick and artless account of the situation in which he found him recently after his wife's death:
'He was in great affliction.Mrs.Williams was then living in his house,which was in Gough-square.He was busy with the Dictionary.
Mr.Shiels,and some others of the gentlemen who had formerly written for him,used to come about him.He had then little for himself,but frequently sent money to Mr.Shiels when in distress.
The friends who visited him at that time,were chiefly Dr.
Bathurst,and Mr.Diamond,an apothecary in Cork-street,Burlington-gardens,with whom he and Mrs.Williams generally dined every Sunday.There was a talk of his going to Iceland with him,which would probably have happened had he lived.There were also Mr.Cave,Dr.Hawkesworth,Mr.Ryland,merchant on Tower Hill,Mrs.
Masters,the poetess,who lived with Mr.Cave,Mrs.Carter,and sometimes Mrs.Macaulay,also Mrs.Gardiner,wife of a tallow-chandler on Snow-hill,not in the learned way,but a worthy good woman;Mr.(now Sir Joshua)Reynolds;Mr.Millar,Mr.Dodsley,Mr.
Bouquet,Mr.Payne of Paternoster-row,booksellers;Mr.Strahan,the printer;the Earl of Orrery,Lord Southwell,Mr.Garrick.'